Nemesis

I was may be ten years of age and it was for the very first time that this was happening. My very strict father was going to be travelling for work. He had to be attending a training in Visakhapatnam, which would keep him away from home for a week! Oh sweet Lord, there were fountains for joy & excitement exploding every time I was able to believe it was true. Thinking back, it’s really unlikely I did a good job of concealing my happiness. So what did Papa do? He gave me homework. Maths. Many pages. No, many many pages. He made it clear that by the time he returned, he expected all these pages filled. But then, an amazing thing happened. He packed his suitcase and left for Visakhapatnam.

I don’t know which words to use to explain this happiness. Exhilarated? How does a prisoner feel who just came out of prison? Or how does one feel when he is not scared anymore? Yeah, no words. So here was the situation — I had 7 days of freedom, and no one to discipline me. Sure, there was homework, but once I got to it, would it really take that much time? So, I stepped out of my house, to play cricket with my friends. Today, I will play till the sun goes down and it becomes impossible to play any more. I returned home, had an evening snack and watched TV. Mummy politely reminded of the homework, but TV didn’t let me listen to her. Watching Doordarshan for so long had to make you tired even then. So I took dinner and went to bed. I still had all of six days left.

No one woke me up the next morning. I woke up when I woke up — on my own. My life, my decisions. Summer holidays were an absolutely excellent reason to meet my friends even during the day. There was so much to do! We played Name-Place-Animal-Thing, hide & seek, and went around the neighborhood throwing stones on Jamun trees to collect and eat some — oh these little joys! Where were they before? Days became busier everyday. Wake up, have breakfast, gather friends, play, lunch, rest, play again, watch TV, have dinner, may be play some more and hit the bed. It was nuts and four days had passed by. Every now and then, Mummy politely reminded of a few Maths problems I had to solve. Politely and never too pushy. The evening of the fourth day of freedom, I decided I would definitely open that notebook and commit to solving those demons. Just a little bit heavy hearted, I went to bed.

Next morning brought something I did not expect at all. My friends woke me up really early and we went for a walk in the park nearby. City Park was huge and even had a lake. There were plants, beautiful flowers and eye pleasing landscapes. We walked about, soaked up the morning sun, played a bit and came home tired just as the sun was beginning to hot up. The day was off to a tough start, so I took a shower, had breakfast and well, slept for a bit. Mummy woke me up for lunch. After having which, I had to catch up with my friends since we meant to catch up on the rest of the schedule. I had to return that evening and open my Maths notebook which I was putting away until now. And I did that. The evening of the fifth day, after having a tough match of gully cricket, I came back and diligently pulled out that dreaded brown-covered notebook. I had almost understood the first problem, when the electricity went away. Bokaro, being a Steel City had a pretty stable, uninterrupted power supply. But sometimes, it could happen. An hour later, I gave up waiting. It just wasn’t meant to be.

It was now my final day of Freedom. How was I supposed to feel? It is all about to be over. Papa was to return this evening. I only had a few hours. I looked at the Maths notebook and saw death. Panic. And History had taught us well enough — Maths problems can never be solved in Panic. So, while I still went to my friends, I could not really play. Every now and then, I would have a mini heart attack as I choked on my fear. When I returned that evening, Papa was already home and having tea. I gulped and briskly walked past him. I think he had smiled. Could he have forgotten?

No chance. He called my name from another room. My spine froze. I knew I had to go now and but I could not move. When Mummy nudged I had no option left. If he called my name again, things could become even worse. Innocent Lamb. Butcher. Lamb picked up the notebook and walked. Papa had to almost snatch the notebook from my hands. He looked at the notebook and called my mom. She told him, that she had reminded me every single day. She was right. Not a single problem was attempted. The pencil hadn’t even touched the page. He was furious. Volcanic. The green nylon skipping rope crashed on my legs a few times. I think Mummy was trying to save me, but I can’t be sure if she gave her hundred percent.

I did not step out for the next three days, for two reasons. One, I had to solve all of those problems that Maths had and second, it takes time for scars to heal. It took all of three days for me to solve the problems, heal the scars and score decent marks in my mid-term exams.

Little did I know, that this incident would become a fond memory years later. Dear Papa, you were a gem of a person. Thank You for doing everything you could do for us and more. Thank You for being a symbol of strength, of care, of quiet but strong love — and also for the discipline. I regret not being able to hug you enough number of times. Lots of Love.

I lost my father to Covid on 19th April, 2021